Creepy Bad Art #3: Lady Monkey Guitarington

As you may know, Will and I have a strange affinity for terrible, creepy art. Preferably the kind involving animals or children, or, if the stars have aligned correctly, animals who may or may not have murdered children.

The Bitch Had It Coming, 2011

The apartment we moved into a few months ago has a long, narrow hallway – the perfect venue to display such oddities – and we have been on a mission to find them ever since. Which is why we nearly LOST OUR MINDS yesterday when I spotted and immediately purchased this bizarre monstrosity:

In the words of my sister, whom I texted a picture of it to: “What…I just…what?” Now, the guitar isn’t completely surprising – monkeys have plenty of dexterity in their hands and have long been considered the rock gods of the animal kingdom – but several questions remain. For instance, why is the monkey fancy? Is she monkey royalty, or merely a monkey court jester or prostitute, seduced and dolled up by a wealthy benefactor? And why is a man’s leather fedora sitting beside her? This leads me to envision a Titanic scenario, wherein Lady Monkey Guitarington’s lover has adoringly laid her out on the bed, taken off his hat and brushed the sexy, blonde fur out of his eyes, and begun to sketch her figure in all of its ravishing lumpiness. It’s astounding, really, how he manages to catch that darling sparkle of inhuman bloodlust in her eyes.

Needless to say, this is my new favorite possession and I wish to be buried with it. Any other fun title ideas?



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