Remember the Maine, Part II

Yesterday I wrote about the ins and outs of my recent trip to Maine, including the alpaca farm at which we stayed. (To recap: alpacas are the cutest.) Today I’ve saved for the weird stuff.

Because to me, vacations are all about finding the crazy. What’s the point of stepping out your door if you don’t eventually stumble upon a can with a picture of a bird wearing a top hat?

I will pay you one million dollars for this.

Among the stranger things that Will and I saw on our trip: the Desert of Maine. I had not heard of such a thing before, but it seems as though a lot of New Englanders have. It’s basically a handful of acres of sand in the middle of heavily-wooded Maine. Deserts do not belong in Maine, hence: the Desert of Maine, Tourist Attraction.

And its native fiberglass camels.
Were the five steps from the tour trolley too much for you there, sport?

But lest you think the Desert of Maine is all sand and fake dromedaries, it also featured a barn/museum full of old-timey farm equipment. Get ready for a roller coaster of excitement!

If this band name isn’t taken already, I HEREBY CLAIM IT.
A obligatory book tie-in scythe!
I don’t follow.

Speaking of ridiculous tourist attractions, what’s that you say, DeLorme Map Headquarters? You’ve got a gigantic scale model of Earth? And you want a wacky photo of someone pretending to hold it up? LET ME HELP YOU OUT WITH THAT.

Looking good, Atlas!

Moving on to the L.L. Bean flagship store in Freeport (by which I mean a huge collection of L.L. Bean stores so big that they refer to it as a campus), where there was a fun little bubble in an aquarium that you could stick your head up into. I’m sure it was meant for dignified, wonderous photos like this:

But that’s just not how we do.

Gollum: the early years
Gollum: the later years.

And now for some really random stuff. I spotted this delightful sticker in Portland that may as well be the line on my family crest:

And all damn night!

We also took a hike up a mountain (okay, it may have been a medium-sized hill, whatever) and when we got to the top, all we saw was this group of people sitting and staring off into the distance, not moving, not talking, not even turning around to look at us. I will go ahead and assume they were cyborgs until someone informs me otherwise.

The mothership is due to arrive in T-12 minutes, so hang tight, guys.

We visited Dickinson’s, a very cool candy shop in Old Orchard Beach, which sent Will into fits of this:

Paramedics were called to the scene moments later.

And sent a kick-dancing line of anthropomorphic jelly beans into fits of this:

“We’re terrifying!”

But the best photo from Maine, hands down, is this one:

I don’t know if it’s authentic or not (though it seemed to be), but either way, I’m sure it’ll be turned into a Lifetime Movie in six months’ time.




  1. Great pics!! I totally love that sticker on the sign. I need like a million of them. :) ALl those people on the mountain…kinda weird and creepy.

  2. Loved the sticker (and your caption) – it’s pretty much my family’s crest these days, too!

    I didn’t know about the desert or the DeLorme Map Headquarters either – and I worked at AAA!?! Between cute alpacas, plastic dromedaries, cyborgs and a desperate 12-year-old looking for cats it seems like you and Will had a fantastic time.

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