Crafty Crappy Christmas Cards

Every year my pal Claire throws a holiday card-making party, because she and several other of my friends are very good at scrapbooky skills and collectively have enough stamps, stickers, glitter, and trimmings to start their own Paper Source. Now, scrapbooky skills are one of the few areas of craftiness that I am not all up on, nor am I very good at. However, not being one to pass up an afternoon of glue sticks, friends, and as many Trader Joe’s Pastry Bites with Feta Cheese and Caramelized Onion as I can cram down my throat, off to the party I went.

But again: not very good at it. Also not good at: holiday cheer. I’m not morally against it or anything, I just have a difficult time expressing peace on earth and goodwill toward men in a genuine, heartfelt fashion. So my cards always end up a little on the weirder, did-a-first-grader-make-this? side. When the end of the party rolls around and everyone shows off their stunningly beautiful creations to thunderous applause, mine always get raised eyebrows, a few laughs, and a “Wow, Gina. You should, um…put those on your blog.”

FINE I WILL.

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To be clear, those last two were specifically made with certain people in mind: my sister, who loves turkeys, and my friend who will hopefully get the Breaking Bad reference and not think I’m just flat-out calling her a bitch. (Though really, it’ll work either way.)

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12 comments

  1. My favorite is the lame one. I would be incredibly happy to get one of these cards. Last year we got one from a friend that had check boxes with “Happy Chanukah” or “Merry Christmas” or “Happy New Year” and he just checked off whichever applied…hilarious. :)

  2. I would love to get one of the two with pinguins… not usre wich one is the winner for me, but they all are perfectly funny a cute and that is all that is necessery! They are simply perfect !

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