Behind the Book – CROAK, Chapters #21-22


Behind the Book is an ongoing series wherein I tackle a new chapter* of Croak each week and give you all of the secret, behind-the-scenes tidbits and trivia that went into writing it. For an archive of past chapters, click here. To read the spoilers, highlight the blank spaces marked with <<hi>>; proceed at your own risk if you haven’t read the entire series. Enjoy!

*The longer the book goes on, the more I’ve already told you and the less I can talk about spoilery stuff, so I’ll be doubling up on chapters from here on out.

Chapter 21: The Hamming

  • Uncle Mort gets a mean dig in at postal workers in this chapter, and I’m sorry for that – not only because they’re an easy target, but because almost all of the postal workers I’ve encountered have been perfectly lovely people.
  • I’ve always had my own idea of what Uncle Mort looks like, and I’m always delighted to hear from readers when they picture a particular actor playing him, but I haven’t thought of this one before: when I read back through this chapter and came to the part where he flips out on Lex for telling Cordy about Croak, I suddenly got a flash of Jon Hamm. I know, I know, he’s too clean-cut, but I’ve been slowly working my way through Mad Men recently and that psychotic outburst is pure Don Draper.


Chapter 22: 

      • For the record: when I am a geezer, I too will be devastated when bingo night gets canceled.
      • When Lex confesses to Uncle Mort that she set the pizza box on fire and he automatically dismisses her powers, <<he is totally bluffing. Knowing what he knows and suspects about Lex (all the stuff that’s revealed in Scorch and Rogue), all he’s thinking right now is “HOLY CRAP”, but he certainly can’t tip them off. Uncle Mort’s always had a stellar poker face.>>
      • Lex and Driggs have a terrible fist kiss, and here is where I get to tell the story of my first kiss, which was also terrible. Let’s start with the fact that it wasn’t a real kiss at all, because it was in a rehearsal for my high school’s production of Guys and Dolls. I was playing Sarah Brown (yes, that’s the lead, I was truly a STAR) and the time came for me to kiss the kid who was playing Sky Masterson. Now, I was a freshman and he was a senior, and also he was gross and ugly, and also we were doing this in front of my English teacher, the director, who was scrutinizing our performances with all the focus of a hawk. So we got to the point in the script where I’m supposed to kiss him, and I did. We pressed on to the end of the scene, and then there was a nice long awkward pause…after which my teacher says, in the wryest tone possible, “Think maybe you can kiss him on the mouth next time?” Ew ew ew ew ew.

Got any questions about Chapter 21 or 22? Post them below!


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